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Eight
Pages of fans worst movies they have seen
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8
Douglas
Quaid
1.
Hell comes to frog town. "Hell" is what i went through watching
this. This film is bad with a capital B. I have seen 2 films
starring "rowdy" roddy piper and they live was a masterpiece
compared to this. Its not even so bad its funny, its so bad
its sickening. And poor sandahl bergman is in it too, she
should have quit acting after red Sonja.
2.
Texas chainsaw massacre. Yuck. This film leaves a bad taste
in your mouth, your brain and your wallet when you buy the
DVD before seeing the film.
3.
Spawn. I saw the film for one reason which was the clip in
the trailer when spawn has two Uzi and does a forward flip.
I thought that looks cool. How wrong could i be. The FX artists
were so lazy they couldn't even be arsed to animate Malebolgia's
mouth. The Dredd movie is a classic in comparison.
4.
Scary Movie. The people that made this seem to think that
making a disgusting and incredibly unimaginative film and
calling it a comedy makes it funny, well they were right!
look at the takings at the box office. In my opinion though
it is utter crap, I pity the people that laugh at this. Oh
yeah and one of the few amusing bits is just ripped off from
that Budweiser advert.
5.
Armageddon. This film was really successful, i don't know
why. If i am around when the world ends I am sure it ill be
more exciting than this pap. The most enjoyable bit was seeing
Mr cooper from "hanging with mr cooper" at the start.
Ken
Manson
1.
Errr...Judge Dredd? For just being plain stupid as well as
ruining the comic.
2.
Eraser For being the worst in a long line of bad Arnie films
where he is stupidly indestructible and for lowering the average
movie 'goodness' rate by at least a point simply by existing.
Commando could also be here, except that was the first in
a long line of bad Arnie films etc etc.
3.
Pokemon For all the kids who could have been watching Toy
Story instead of poorly animated, poorly disguised marketing
tripe. Well animated, poorly disguised marketing tripe is
so much better ;)
4.
Wild Wild West For making me spend £4 and two hours watching
it when I could have been doing something more entertaining...
I dunno, extinguishing matches with my testicles would be
one, eating chilli coated barbed wire would be another...
5.
Texas Chainsaw Massacre (really not impressed). For being
awful and hurting my ears, after about 45 mins there is *one*
sound effect. Well, two if you count screaming.
Catburgla
1.
Surely Titanic Hmmm. Home computer grade 'special effects'
(8 bit textures anyone?) Laughable accents. Drama club acting.
Norman Lamont as the male lead
2.
Phantom Menace Someone had to speak up for it. Jar Jar, Politics
and no Stormtroopers. nuff said
3.
No Suggestion.
4.
There's Something about Mary. I took this DVD back. False
advertising. Box said 'hilarious'
5.
The Indian In The Cupboard. Only film I ever walked out of.
Went to see it because Steve Coogan was in it. For about 2
minutes.
Spuggy
Loonpant
1. Grease
- It's a musical. The lowest of the low.
2. Tank
Girl - Just as you think it can't get any worse: a song and
dance routine.
3. Almost
anything starring Stallone or Costner - they are shit.
4. Phantom
Menace - and you thought ewoks were bad. We waited ten years
then Lucas gave us a movie for ten year olds.
5. Highlander
- spoilt by bad effects and acting. Hugely overrated.
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