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1997
86 mins Starring Mitch Pileggi
Set
in the small Alaskan town of Burly Pines. Our hero Jim is
an entemologist (studies insects) & published author of 'bug'
books, from L.A.
He hooks up with a chopper pilot friend who flies them north
to Alaska for some fishing. After arriving at a lake several
hours of fishing produce no joy - strange - during previous
weeks "salmon were jumping onto your line". Our intrepid duo
get fed up and decide to return to town for some nosebag.
On the way to the chopper they encounter two hunters who are
searching for a recently shot moose (huge deer type animal
- not a wee scottish rodent). When the four of them find the
moose it has been stripped of all flesh and organs.
All this has happened in a very short space of time. Stranger
still. Our twosome fly to a local store to find out if anyone
knows what could have done this. No-one is in store and after
searching they find the owner Murdock in a back room. He also
has ben stripped of flesh but is still fully clothed. Even
stranger still. The local Sherriff is called and he is also
baffled. The body is taken to town and on closer examination
Jim finds parts of an ant embedded in the skull of the dead
Murdock. Weird.
With the help of the local teacher (love interest, pretty
but a total bimbo who states the obvious at every opportunity)
they deduce the body parts belong to a Marabunta - A KILLER
ANT - These are native to South America but have infiltrated
Alaska on a cargo of acacia wood shed from an off course ship
ten years earlier. They gather and breed and attack in ten
year cycles.
How convenient our bug expert chose to go fishing here exactly
ten years after they are washed ashore. Meantime a newly married
couple touring Alaska stop to take some photos. On looking
for a suitable spot they come across a huge structure rising
from the ground. They do not have a clue what it is but decide
it would look good if the girl climbs atop and he shoots a
few frames. Up she goes and on reaching the top she slips
and falls into the centre where the ants are licking their
lips in anticipation. Her beloved tries to rescue her but
the ants fancy seconds, Bye bye.
ANTS 3 HUMANS 0 (even I knew it was an anthill).
Several more "gruesome" deaths later our hero manages to convince
the Sheriff to evacuate the town. It did take his Deputy's
little brother being killed to finally sway him. Everyone
leaves except one stubborn resident. Guess what.
ANTS 5+ HUMANS 0.
Only people left in town are Jim, bimbo teacher, Sheriff and
his son (a right pain - tell him not to do it and he does
it) They all have a miraculous ability to see the ants over
vast distances even though they are tiny. How ??.
One solution is to kill the Queen, this disorientates her
workers and makes them easier to kill. She can't be found
- what a surprise.
After several other vain attempts to halt their progress someone
comes up with the answer. Why not blow the dam and drown them.
Easy. Town will be flooded but what the heck !!
I won't spoil the ending - if you can manage to last that
long. This is a dreadful film. Stunts and special effects
are abysmal, the actors are awful and the script is horrendous.
Everyone states the obvious, a muppet could have written this.
I have had more excitement picking up dog doo from the garden
with a pooper scooper. This storyline has been done before
and oh soooo much better. It is a load of rubbish. A total
ANTY-CLIMAX (sorry).
Roll on the next ten years until the ants regroup and we can
enjoy again.
Final
score ANTS 10 -20 HUMANS MILLIONS & MILLIONS.
Morvy Babe
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