In
Gallup, Texas, two stupid teenagers are getting horny in a
car out in the middle of the desert. Of course, such a scene
is a staple in horror and monster movies, and because the
movie is called 'Bats', it doesn't take much guessing by the
viewer to figure out what will happen to the dozy twosome.
After we are shown the gory bat attack which rips the adolescents
to shreds, we are introduced to our heroine, Dina Meyer -
looking very tasty dangling off a cliff face - who you may
remember from 'Starship Troopers'. Her companion is, oh dear,
a wise cracking, smug quip blabbing, 'funny guy' who is of
course black, after all, 'all black people are funny' - thought
the script writers - shame on them! Leon, who is handed this
sorry role, does what he can with the dire one - liners but
he just ends up looking like a fool. These two chums are (wait
for it) 'batologists' who, whilst poking about a bat lair
gathering 'data', are called upon to investigate some strange
bat related incidences in Gallup. Upon arriving they encounter
Sheriff Kimsey, a dull Lou Diamond Phillips, who gets all
uppity when they think there's a problem in his picturesque
little town. From this moment on the audience are spoon fed
various scenes involving bats going beserk and attacking people.
Although these moments are occasionally entertaining, you
quickly bore of them as they all lack imagination, style and
most importantly, gore and violence, something which you would
expect to be mandatory in this type of flick. All we really
see are scratches and the odd bat bite, nothing a first aid
kit couldn't handle.
Buy
Bats [1999] on DVD at Amazon!
Sometimes
director Louis Morneau is incredibly lazy, a tasteless scene
involving a bat in a baby's cot, a ho-hum bat chase inside
a school, and a bat attack on an army convoy where we aren't
shown any action, just the aftermath of bodies and flames
(I am reminded of 'Phantoms' where a similar scene is also
played out), are prime examples. Curiously enough, at other
times Morneau is quite inventive and conjures up some cracking
set pieces, most notably a nod to 'The Birds' where the bats
invade the streets of Gallup and trap Meyer inside a cinema
ticket booth. Shortly before this we see her scuttling about
a supermarket trying to shoot a pestering bat, whose point
of view the audience are placed in. The result is infra red
stretched celluloid shots of a petrified Ms.Meyer combined
with ominous screeching noises. Clever eh?
Another
plus which I should like to mention is Dina Meyer who gives
a sterling performance. Why don't we see more of her? Everyone
else involved in this silly movie doesn't deserve a mention,
perhaps the SFX crew and production team deserve a pat on
the back though.
Of
course, none of this raises the status of this rubbish which
, although trashy and undeniably fun at times, should be avoided
if you're sober and not in the company of friends.
Fact:
This movie was one of the first to be unveiled by the now
defunct 'Destination Films'. Surely they must have known that
the inevitable destination for 'Bats' was the bottom shelf
at Blockbuster's?
Simon@HAM
Movies
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